When small doesn’t really mean SMALL!

My name is Peanut – I’m a terrier cross and an artist’s model.
So feeling a little fed up with paintings of me in other folk’s homes I decided to order a portrait of me for me. My human asked how much I wanted to spend. I had a half chewed bone buried beneath the pillows in the spare room and figured that should do it. She asked if I had any special requests. “I sure do” I said, “I’m sick of humans saying I’m FAT, make me SMALL!”
Now for the record, I’m not fat, I’m horizontally generous, and I’m all muscle. You should see me run; you can see the muscle in action, not a wobbly lump of lard in sight. Not that I run too often, I hate sweaty paws.
I should have grown suspicious when my human had my portrait finished in a few hours, they normally take her days. I had given her a down-payment of a quarter of a bone – I couldn’t resist chewing the rest of it!
As you’ll see from the photo of me with my portrait, I was pretty shocked at what she produced. I said, “Are you for real?” as she snapped the camera at me and my portrait, congratulating herself on capturing the likeness on a 3 x 3 inch canvas.
“Well you said to make you small,” she retorted.
The moral of my blog – when ordering a portrait, best to be specific about the specifics.
What a waste of quarter of a chewed bone.

 

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